Am I cut out for international teaching/teaching at all?

[StayOrGo]

I'm having a bit of a career crisis. Maybe some of you have been through something similar before, and hopefully can offer some advice.

I left my secure, well-paying public school job in Canada last year to take a job at a third-tier (not even) school in an amazing city in Western Europe. I found the demands of teaching stressful in Canada (I was only in my second year), but I was thriving professionally: lots of PD, constantly trying new things and challenging myself, feeling like I was doing a pretty good job and making a difference. I felt very fulfilled professionally, however I didn't have much "work-life" balance - my job was all-consuming. I think I did put a lot of pressure on myself, and I knew there was still so much to learn.

When I arrived in my new position here in Europe (near the end of the school year, as a kind of floater to fill in for a mix of sick and maternity leaves), I realized immediately the bar had lowered significantly. This is a relatively new, for-profit school, without any real curriculum, and teachers can really do as much or as little as they like. When I first arrived, the lack of pressure was a relief, and I was grateful to feel like I could have a life outside of work. For a few months, it all seemed great (though in the back of my mind, I knew the major downgrade in quality of education would be an issue).

Fast-forward to now:
- My schedule is completely different now that I have my own class - I don't have enough prep time and feel completely overwhelmed. Also, this is a grade change for me, so everything is new.
- The lack of curriculum/total disorganization at my new school is starting to wear on me. I miss higher standards, I miss feeling like there is always room for improvement and growth, and I miss feeling part of a team that is motivated. There are no opportunities for PD.
- I am finding teaching stressful all over again, in a different way - there is such disorganization, and a lot is put on teachers last-minute. There is so little already in place, everything is new and put on teachers to figure out (e.g. curriculum! but also small things like SEN, parent teacher conferences, supervision, etc.) These are the types of things that cut into my already rare and precious prep time.
- A lot of my colleagues are young and make school their social life. I find this has really eroded professionalism, and there is a group that is petty, gossipy, etc. (which I'm sure one can find at any school, but my school is small and makes it more noticeable.)

I have found that I am so drained and overwhelmed that I am struggling to maintain a life outside of school (despite living in a city that offers everything imaginable). In fact, I think I am depressed. I have already started to think about what to do for next year, and I am questioning whether I am even cut out for teaching. I think I am more sensitive than the average person, needing a lot of downtime to decompress from a school day, and greatly affected by any friction with colleagues. (Note, living abroad is not the issue - I love living abroad, and can handle the challenge of being far from friends and family.)

In my mind, there is a dream school where there is not too much pressure (e.g. elite, top-tier IS), yet staff is still very motivated and dedicated, children are valued and in a nurturing environment, and the learning that takes place is exciting and stimulating (I am partial to more alternative schools/teaching, e.g. forest schools, project-based learning, Montessori, etc. I have never worked with PYP, but I am familiar with it and think I would like it.) Also, this dream school is organized and run in such a way that the teachers can focus mainly on teaching and the well-being of their students, and school leadership manages the rest - as well as offering opportunities for professional growth. On top of that, there is enough support/prep time to do my job well during a school day (e.g. 8am - 4pm or 5pm), leaving enough time to enjoy hobbies and socializing after working hours. I am really not concerned about making a lot of money - I don't make much now, and I don't mind at all.

Does this dream teaching situation exist? Or should I start looking at a career change? I really do love working with children and teaching, and I think I am good at it, but I am concerned about how the stress of teaching is affecting the rest of my life. I am wondering if I am in the wrong school or the wrong profession. Any advice would be much appreciated!

[joe30]

Wait, you're essentially whinging about low standards?

Low standards are what enables a good work-life balance. It's when managers get into their heads that everyone should be slaving away at that grindstone, coming up with perfect lesson plans, making loads of resources etc...that's when your work-life balance ends.

From what I understand, the super-elite tier of school will leave you with very little work-life balance, but they will pay you more. Third tier places pay less but a lot of them have low standards, to the point that some are happy with any warm body in the room, regardless of what happens.

Also, keep in mind work is work, and you're not neccesarily meant to enjoy it - most people don't enjoy their jobs. You go to work to earn the money you need to enable you to live a good life after 5pm and on the weekends. If you can 'tolerate' your job, and are happy with your lifestyle outside work...that really should be enough.

[helloiswill]

I don't think the OP was whining about low standards.

Schools with high standards often (not always) have experienced leadership and, as a teacher, you will get less last minute curve balls thrown at you when it comes to scheduling, curriculum testing, etc.

A newer school with "lower" standards could certainly present stressful obstacles if there is a lack of organization from the top. You may end up spending a lot of your time putting out fires that a more competent leadership team would mitigate before you were even aware.

My guess is that whether or not you are cut out for international teaching is the wrong question to be asking. Poor administration exists through out education, both domestically, and internationally. Maybe the next school you look at shouldn't be at a, as you described, "not even 3rd tier" school.

[chilagringa]

In my experience, work-life balance is half the job of the teacher, but half the job of the school.

I think it's impossible to NEVER work outside of school if you want to be a good teacher, but a decent school with work-life balance you won't have to do it so often. For example, I usually am done by about 4 (an hour after school ends), but occasionally have a chunk of papers I just have to grade at home.

I think it's the job of the school to provide a manageable teaching load (two, MAYBE three preps) and sufficient planning time every day. Most decent international schools offer 5/8 teaching load, that, once you take off time for the inevitable meetings, means about an average of 90 minutes of prep a day. I would never accept a job that didn't offer this manageable workload.

But it's also the job of the teacher to balance things. My current school is the most manageable workload I have ever had, and there are still teachers overwhelmed with stress. Really, I think that's their fault. Teaching is an exercise in picking and choosing your battles, and knowing when to give it your all and when to give yourself a break. For example, say you put together an amazing collaborative learning experience one day that takes a lot of time to prep. The next day? Why not use the activities straight out of the textbook? If you are a rockstar half the time, you're enough of a rockstar. Students need their teachers alert, happy and relaxed as much as anything else.

[reisgio]

You are depressed and a perfectionist, and probably a bit OCD. You should start applying to other schools ASAP in your current country, throughout Europe, South America, USA, and Canada. I would venture to guess you would be happiest professionally in Canada or US in a well functioning independent school with solid long lasting leadership even if the workload was higher because you thrive with structure and order, but I assume that would become very monotonous to you, thus, you may prefer the life-work balance in Europe better. There are some great schools in Vancouver area. Just do what you can during the day and remind yourself that you have great and growing experience. You've worked in very different situations and sell that if you get an interview at a third option in the weeks and months ahead. You are sort of like goldilocks and the there bears. You are looking for just right and after these two experience you probably know what that just right is, you just may need to be patient to find it and in the meantime, I would stay in Europe as long as you can as especially since the city you are in sounds like a great fit for you. Remember as only one teacher you can't change the place you are in, but you can do your best and that does not equal stressing or working the most; it means be your happiest and best self so that the children take note of you and your professionalism.

[shadowjack]

LOL StayorGo! You said, " I felt very fulfilled professionally, however I didn't have much "work-life" balance - my job was all-consuming."

Don't you realize that for 90% of new teachers that's the reality of teaching for the first few years until you master things, get your curriculum under control and learn shortcuts?

However, if you feel a school is not very good, and is not professional enough for your standards, my question is why are you still there? Do you time to honour your contract and leave. Either return to Canada or go to a fair, seek out new schools, new countries, to boldly go where you have never gone before!, or use a service like TIEonline or an ISS virtual fair to recruit.

Good luck! One word of advice - start planning your financial future now - it sneaks up fast!

[StayOrGo]

I just want to say, I came to this forum feeling pretty desperate and low. Thank you SO MUCH to everyone who took the time to reach out and reply - I really needed it, and I feel so much better already.

@joe30, maybe you're right, perhaps I have to choose and cannot have work/life balance AND high standards - in other words, can't have my cake and eat it too. Thanks for your perspective.

@helloiswill, you put it perfectly: "you end up spending a lot of your time putting out fires that a more competent leadership team would mitigate before you were even aware". I now know, for the next school, that I have to aim higher and make sure it's a more established, organized institute. Thank you for reply!

@chilagringa, I agree completely with your philosophy that it's a half-half responsibility. I will keep that in mind for the rest of the year, and make sure I am not getting overwhelmed over things that I can control. I'll aim to be a rockstar half of the time ; )

@resigio, thanks for the straight talk, lol. Your response, along with the others, has helped me see that it is not time to give up on teaching completely, but to get started right away on finding a new school after the end of this contract. I'll try to remember to take care of myself so that my students get the best me : )

@shadowjack, I do realize, but sometimes I forget that I'm still only at the beginning of my career. Thanks for the reality check :) I'm still there because I would not leave mid-year, but thanks to all the wonderful responses I've gotten, I do feel motivated enough to start looking for a new school for next year. And thanks for the financial advice - I've been thinking recently maybe I'm being to overzealous saving-wise, that I should save less so that I can splurge a little more each month, but your comment nixed those doubts.

[mamava]

There are often a lot of negative comments about international teaching here, but at all the schools I've been fortunate to work at, there's definitely been a motto of "work hard, play hard." There are negatives and uncertainties that sometimes make me remember the States, but in general, I have worked at schools that have asked for a lot, but also provided the resources, planning, structure, and support that enable us to do what is asked. I've also generally seen my admin share the same view.

You are in a sucky school and that's too bad that your impression might be that it doesn't get better. It really can--and sometimes you'll be amazed that the best experiences can come in places you never thought you'd live. We all have regions we want, and we all have those "no way" spots, but in general, we've gone for the school, not the location. When the school's good, the location falls into place--when the school's bad, it doesn't matter where you are, you'll be unhappy (at least for us!)

Good luck!

[PsyGuy]

I actually have little to add that hasnt been addressed by previous contributors, what I will add is that you are essentially working too hard. You are doing more than you have too to be successful. You may wish to consider incrementally reducing your efforts and see how they effect the success of your lessons, and when you find a happy medium between work and a lesson your satisfied with you can stay at that level of effort.
You get 80% of the outcomes for only 20% of the effort, my feeling is that your expending a great deal of additional resources and effort chasing a few percentage points of increased performance.