raising children abroad

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escapeartist
Posts: 76
Joined: Fri Dec 07, 2012 1:39 pm

raising children abroad

Post by escapeartist »

I am curious about personal experiences raising children while working the International School circuit.

How would you compare medical care, costs of childcare, quality of life, the relative ease or difficulty compared to the U.S., and in which country did you do it (or are you currently doing it)?

Thanks!
adminpaul
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Joined: Thu Aug 10, 2006 8:11 pm

Re: raising children abroad

Post by adminpaul »

wrldtrvlr123
Posts: 1173
Joined: Sat Feb 06, 2010 10:59 am
Location: Japan

Re: raising children abroad

Post by wrldtrvlr123 »

All depends on the school/country. Medical care in Egypt was iffy. China, Germany and Japan very good. Childcare was cheap in China and Egypt, expensive in Japan and Germany.

Overall quality of life, Japan just edges Germany for us (with both being excellent). As for how it affects the child's life in general? Results will vary. We have loved it and it's been great for our family but I can see scenarios where this lifestyle could have some negative consequences for kids.

I have seen some teacher's children in schools where native english speakers are a minority have a difficult time (mainly in the middle east). Also, medical care and environmental factors could certainly cause some problems (e.g. pollution in China, political unrest in the ME, etc).

I think the nomadic lifestyle can also be a mixed bag. Moving every 2 years (or so) can cause feelings of feeling rootless, always being the new kid etc or foster an ability to be able to fit in quickly, develop self-confidence etc.

Whatever you do as a parent will be wrong on some level so do your research and make the best decision you can for your family.
grdwdgrrrl
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Joined: Thu May 23, 2013 6:26 pm

Re: raising children abroad

Post by grdwdgrrrl »

We have similar feelings about being abroad with our kids. We were very long term in China and two of my children were born there. Because of the transient nature of Int'l schools we chose to put our kids in a nearby local kindy and primary school to counteract that transient ness. So, they had neighborhood friends and though they were the one foreign kid in school, the curiosity factor faded quickly. Besides, their language skills are amazing. Now, we are in a different country, and the kids are at our international school. Classmates come and go, and their Chinese has plateaued but, they are happy. So, being happy is important and so far we've succeeded with them. However, even though we'd really like to move on, we have decided to stay another contract in order to maintain some stability. We don't want to move every two years, it's such a pain and disruptive.
shadowjack
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Joined: Sat Oct 06, 2012 9:49 am

Re: raising children abroad

Post by shadowjack »

Kids went to school in four countries over their primary and secondary years. All of the schools had a high ex-pat population. One thing we didn't want to do was put our kids in an international school mainly for locals, because of what we had seen and heard during our first couple of stints overseas.

Both kids are much more aware of the world than their peers back "home". They have some vastly different experiences that most of their peers will never have and they now have access to a global network of friends as they continue on through college and start their careers.

Overall, it has been good for my kids. However, TBH, I have seen kids where it was not the best thing for them. Every child is different.
eion_padraig
Posts: 408
Joined: Sat Dec 11, 2010 8:18 pm

Re: raising children abroad

Post by eion_padraig »

Less related to the advantages of parenting, but still portant is that kids who grow up abroad become Third Culture Kids. This has some advantages and disadvantages. Whether it's a good thing or not depends a lot on your personal values, but being a TCK impacts people's psychological development in major ways. If you're not familiar with TCK/Global Nomads, I suggest reading up on it. A good percentage of TCK's end up living internationally as adults too. I work with a number of teachers who grew up as TCKs. Some people have already discussed the advantages of being.

I've seen some kids struggle with it especially if they left to live overseas when they were older (adolescence) or if they move too frequently. I read one study that equated too frequent, short term, consecutive moves as causing major problems with people having intimate relationships. The tease archers actually compared to damage caused by sexual abuse. That struck me as a bit extreme, but I've worked with kids who attended more than 8 schools by high school and there do seem to be significant academic and social challenges at times.

Overall, I think TCKs are great. I would recommend to parents that they attempt to stay put at schools for longer stretches of 3+ years at a time. This is a big issue. Certainly there are a lot of things to consider, but that's the nature of having kids.
escapeartist
Posts: 76
Joined: Fri Dec 07, 2012 1:39 pm

Re: raising children abroad

Post by escapeartist »

Thanks for your responses. Anyone else?
Nomad68
Posts: 175
Joined: Mon Jun 18, 2012 11:50 pm
Location: East of nowhere you want to be

Re: raising children abroad

Post by Nomad68 »

We are currently in the Middle East with 2 babies and we are concerned about the effects of a transient lifestyle on them and their education so we plan to leave for Europe when they are ready for school. Hopefully we will have saved a decent sum and will be able to find a decent paying job in Europe at a good school where our kids will become settled. We just aren't prepared to gamble on their education and overall happiness by staying on the international circuit.
Overhere
Posts: 497
Joined: Wed Dec 05, 2007 3:29 am

Re: raising children abroad

Post by Overhere »

Just like everything else associated with international teaching, raising children overseas has its positives and negatives. Our kids went to our schools and saw friends come and go, particularly our youngest. It was tough on them, however I think that is the nature of life these days. Medical care was great in some countries and not so great or at least difficult to reach in others, childcare was never an issue as we waited till our youngest was in 1st grade to go over. I would say the hardest part of raising kids overseas is saying goodbye to them as they go off to university and not being close enough to help them through their first year. I know many many students do this with no issues but it was tough for us. I think our kids have found it difficult to be back in North America and not traveling as much as they once did. All of them have told us at one time or another that they want to work overseas, of course just as we are thinking about retiring back to the US. In some ways it has been hard for them to relate to their college aged peers who don't share the same experiences.
julierob25
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Joined: Mon Aug 18, 2014 5:01 am

Re: raising children abroad

Post by julierob25 »

There are definitely positive and negatives. I teach in Europe with my young son. The country we live in is poor and we are able to live well on just my salary. Our first year here he had a fulltime nanny and now he is starting his second year at the school that I work at. He loves school but not playing with children outside of school. I can see his frustration with the other children not being able to communicate with him in English. The private healthcare here is very inexpensive. I enjoy teaching abroad and plan to do it long term.
Teachermom
Posts: 59
Joined: Wed Nov 28, 2012 7:14 am
Location: Asia

Re: raising children abroad

Post by Teachermom »

Here's a great article I read last year about successfully raising TCK's:

http://issuu.com/centeredontaipei/docs/cot_april2014/30
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