I think you all are reading too much into this. Directors are humans too and have their circle that they spend time with outside of work. Could be nothing other than an invitation to brunch. Our director is visible both in school and outside socially...

As part of a teaching couple during our last Search hiring fair, schools weren't interested in us if they only had one opening. All of our interviews were based on there being openings for both of us. Several schools stated clearly that they weren't interested in the risk of one of us not being hired.

Overall, I would not consider Shanghai or Beijing hardship posts either. The pollution may be bad at times, frequently it is no worse than any other major city.

Bangkok is a large city that does have a pollution problem. Most of the year the pollution levels are acceptable, right now they are getting a lot more attention then in the past. You may want to invest in an air purifier for your apartment for ease of mind.

Schools have step levels for what your salary will be. Even though you have 20 years of teaching experience, they will enter you at a lower level on their pay scale. For example my partner and I have 9 years of teaching experience, but with our move we entered at a year 7 pay step.

Making that first international move can be challenging. What fairs are you attending or companies are you registered with? 9 years of experience can be beneficial, but many teachers making the move to IT start out at a school that is not their dream school. Started in Thailand for my first school and gained a foothold in the international market, have since moved onto an absolutely wonderful school. Be open to locations that you maybe didn't consider before. Singapore has some wonderful schools, but the cost of living is rather high for Asia. Your hiring also depends on the school needs that year, some are better than others.

Having the credential would be the best pathway for a career in counseling. More international schools are looking for counselors than in the past and it is a developing role.